Monday, November 17, 2014

I'LL GROW BACK GOOD IF I BREAK

Photos by, Allison Reaves Photography.A continuum of my shoot with Allison, we had coffee this last Friday morning at the Ace. One of those people I can chat with and feel the inspiration jitters the rest of the day. Good vibes coming from her soul and I appreciate that. Below is a non-outfit, related re-hash of things in my week! 

This past week I went and saw Penny & Sparrow and it was truly an amazing experience. Their album Struggle Pretty was released a month before my breakup, and I connected with Andy and Kyle's words like I haven't ever really before. The emotional trauma I went through was exacerbated by lies, and finding out through the grapevine I had been cheated on. It's a shitty thing to go through and I'm still trying to deal with it.

Nearly every song on the album pierces me in the gut and I haven't been able to listen to some of them without crying. That didn't change when they immediately opened their set at Mississippi Studios with their songs Honest Wage and Fantine. I had taken out my camera to snap a picture of them as they were walking up to the stage and immediately put it away, the first strum of Honest wage and I knew I was about to be the one balling in public. 

And I was right at the start. Silently. Trying not to cry with all the muscles in my face and just letting the tears flow. I'm not good at sharing my emotions, or understanding them even. But this is just one of those things where I quite literally have no control of them. No, they weren't tears of joy, they were of extreme heartache. But that's okay. It's a good release and a way to connect with others I don't typically allow myself to do very often. 


I'm a very private person, I know that. But I couldn't share their music without also sharing a part of why I love it so much, and I know many can relate. I am a real person behind pretty outfit pictures and my seemingly stern face. 

So, listen to their music. My favorites are Fantine, Bread and Bleeding, Stoic, and Rattle. Basically the whole album who am I even kidding it's perfect. Plus, Andy Baxters voice is the best I've heard in forever and Kyle Jahnke's man bun is exceptional and I like his blazers. Maybe you have a reason to take some solace in their words like I have. 


Wearing: JCrew Toothpick Denim, Target Flannel Shirt, Topshop Mila oxford (sold out, here's similar) Vintage hat (similar), Timex Watch


Monday, November 10, 2014

TO GRANDMOTHERS HOUSE WE GO

Snapped some photos in the small town of Dallas, Oregon while visiting my grandma this past Saturday. I always really love visiting G-ma, she's a collector of awesome things. Her walls are filled with vintage and antique perfume bottles, dishes, hat boxes, and jewelry. There's lots of inspiration to gain at her house. I mostly like to just sit, stare, take naps and eat candy whenever we go to her house. Also laugh my pants off because my grandma is hilarious.  

Anyways, it's always really important for me to reflect. I'm a natural introvert. A lot of my time is spent alone, reflecting and sometimes obsessively thinking about my past and future. Looking to myself to magically find the answers to life's unanswerable queries. That's something I don't really like about myself. Being an INTJ, it's hard to living in the moment unless every other part of your life is in place and where you want it. 


It's a work in progress to get there. But short moments like these on this blog allow me to just stop and think about what I'm doing this very moment. It helps to affirm my own thoughts. I sort of crawl and mosey around clouds of inspiration, planning and goals before I make a move. And I feel like I'm sort of in the weird space where I need to rediscover what my hobbies are, and what that move is supposed to be.  

Maybe recent grads feel the same way? Before it was school, work and hobbies. They were all separate. Now, much of what I do at work is everything I did in school combined with my Internet hobbies. Those interests of mine are fulfilled on a daily basis, and I'm super appreciative of that. But somehow there's this new blank space for something new— and I'm trying to figure out what that new thing is. 


Maybe I have readers who can relate. Maybe I'm just rambling on about myself and tl;dr. Either way, if you can relate and you did read my words, let me know in the comments! It's Monday and I hope everyone has a fantastic week! 

H&M Boots, Asos Jeans, Target Plaid Shirt, G-Pa's old straw hat (similar, similar). 



Monday, November 3, 2014

EARLY MORNING CABLE KNIT & COFFEE


coffee....I woke up like dis
Photography by, Allison Reaves Photography

I'm thankful to have talented friends around me to collaborate with. Wednesday morning on Oct. 29th Allison and I went out to shoot some photos in one of my absolute favorite spots in Portland. Directly below the St. Johns bridge, aside from Cathedral Park having coffee on the boat docks.  

I grew up in St. Johns, and although the park has become one of the most overshot places in the city, it's for good reason. We were up bright and early, stopped in at Anna Banana's before 7:30 am for coffee, and then headed to the boat docks. 

There's something I really love about being on the water. I've never been one to get seasick, in fact, I reminisce about the times and feeling being on the water gives you. The up and down of the waves is especially calming for me. 


This sweater I've had for years and years. It's shown up on this blog every fall/winter season. These jeans I accrued from a naked lady clothing party over the summer. They're a low waist peg leg jean but in a size or two too big which give them a relaxed look. This scarf was an H&M find. I need to stop shopping there, I go way too much but it's because I always score things I really love, including this scarf. And everyone should know by now about my scarf obsession. 

portland bridges
We started shooting right after sunrise at 7:45 and as someone who doesn't usually get to work till 10, it wore me out but was so worth it. I wouldn't go as far as categorizing myself to morning person, but it's amazing how an early start can effect my mood and level of productivity throughout the day. But it's kind of like working out— you know how good it makes you feel, but the level of effort it takes to make it part of your routine is much easier said than done.  

I'd love to get to that point. Train myself to wake up at 6 a.m. and start productivity before 10 a.m. It'll require an early bedtime and probably a quick 15 minute sesh of coffee making and pinterest pinning to get me inspired for the day. Has anyone else done this? Trained themselves to be a morning person? I just read Patricia Brights blog post about being a morning person and she has some good tips! If you have more tips send them my way! 

coffee and oxfords


PS: I wen't to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show in Portland the night before Halloween and it was so great. The crowd wasn't as participatory as I had expected, but it's totally a thing I could see myself getting into and going wild with it every year. Plus, I love watching drag in general. The showing I went to was at the World Trade Center theater in Portland- who knew Portland had a world trade center? Who knew that there was a theater in it? It's pretty neat in there if you ever have a reason to go! 

early coffee on the dock
What I'm waring: Topshop Milla Oxford, JCrew Toothpick Denim, Cable Knit Sweater-Similar, H&M Scarf

There's a whole series of looks we shot around here, stay tuned every monday for the next couple weeks for more looks.